with a smile

it will come to a point when you get tired of fighting it all off, justifying things so it's easier to digest, believing that things will change sooner or later or sooner. when you've done all the coping mechanism that you can think of and yet before you sleep at night, you still have this pinch in your heart and everything seems to be heavier by the second. when you can't think of anything anymore but to run away to some deserted island and be free of the cruelties of your so-called life.

when there's noone beside you who understands. not even someone who has the patience to listen without judgment.

when you realize how pathetic you are for wallowing on your current state when you know better that there's something you can do about it. and that in reality, yours is not the worst case. you're just the one who makes it sound worse.

thats when you slap yourself and say, move on. acceptance is liberating and though it's a bitter pill to swallow, it will do you good. that you can open your eyes and see that there are more things worth your attention and time. that there's life outside the box you built, that there's more than just what your heart restricts your eyes to see.

that life is still worth living after all. maybe you just need to walk past through the grapevine.